Forming Clay: A Poem by Katlyn Koester

I don't know when exactly I wrote this. It could have been high school, but I think it was middle school. We always had a poetry section in class where we read poems, learned about the styles and different types of poems and then wrote our own poems and ended up with a book at the end of the section.

I guess I have loved clay for a long, LONG time.

Forming Clay

Forming clay is like,

Watching the clouds change shapes.

Never the same twice.

Forming clay is like,

Building a house.

A precise art.

Forming clay is like,

Petting a cat.

Once you start, you don't want to stop.

Forming clay is like,

Trying to see the future.

You never know what will happen till it does.

Forming clay is like,

Putting together a puzzle.

You think something works, then it doesn't fit.

Forming clay is like,

The news.

Some things you like, some you don't.

Forming clay is like,

A person's life.

Unstable at times but always able to be fixed.

My Mystical Side

I find myself being mystical sometimes. Well, really more than sometimes. I don't know if this is a common thing with artists in general or if certain people are generally drawn to the otherwordly and fantastical.

How is it possible that there aren't any fairies living in here?

I look for fairies among the flowers and in cracks and crevices in the rocks and trees. I listen for the trees to talk and messages in the wind.

I keep crystals and gemstones in hopes of good fortune, health, balance and wisdom. When I am feeling stuck, I sometimes pick up amethyst (my birthstone and favorite) or quartz crystals and look for inspiration. I wonder too if there isn't some way to see into the future with a crystal ball and I think I may have to get myself one just to try.

I hope that I may discover that dragons, unicorns, and phoenix were really real.

A dragon rattle in a nest of stones, crystals and some prayer beads I made.

I put some stock in palmistry and tarot readings. I've never had my palm read, though I have tried interpreting it myself. I had a tarot reading done last year and was amazed at the things she saw in the cards.

I look up the meanings behind the imagery and symbols in my dreams, when I remember them, and try to see how it translates to my waking life.

I think there is truth in karma and I hope I'm not messing up my chances of a good life simply by being myself.

I make a wish at 11:11, though I'm not sure where this one came from or why you are supposed to make a wish.

A tree made of gemstones, my sage bundle I made, and a mandala-esque stone I painted.

I have written hopes and wishes on paper and then thrown them into a fire with the thought that burning the physical form of a wish would more readily carry it into the void and maybe it would be heard more clearly than the mumblings in my head.

Just one of many candles I have burned throughout the years.

I light candles for peace, cleansing and hopes. I burn sage bundles and incense for the same purpose.

I wish on shooting stars and look for angels and spirits in the clouds and Northern Lights.

When I find a feather in nature, on a hike usually, I look up what the colors mean because feathers are messages from the spirits.

Black, white and blue denote change on the horizon.

I find myself talking to myself, but am I really talking to only myself? Is there really that thing called a 'Creative Genius' standing in a corner waiting for me to address it? Or maybe I have a spirit or animal guide.

I hope my sculptures one day might find they have heart and spirit all of their own and come alive. I hope for magic in my life. Real magic. Like the kind you find in Harry Potter or Lord of the Rings. I hope I haven't really been passed over to be accepted to Hogwarts. I can't seem to help myself.

To look at me, you wouldn't think I was this mystical. I appear, at least in my mind, I appear to be an average person worrying about everyday things. And I do worry about those every day things. Although I also worry about upsetting the fairies; and what I might see if I look into a crystal ball; and who or what is out there listening to my greatest hopes and dreams and if someday, if I believe enough, they may answer me.

Catching up!

I've been away for a while, a long while. Definitely a lot longer than I had intended to go between posts when I started writing. So here's an update of what I've been up to.

I spent a week with my sister-in-law, hanging out and playing with my nephew. Over the course of that week we watched some movies, had some girl talk, went out to eat, went shopping, kept watch over my nephew as he has gotten more and more mobile, and while he slept we relaxed and I tried to do some more hand piecing.

I had started this square before I left home and I finished it while I was with my sister-in-law. I'm going to have to put a small border on it, all my other squares seen here, are 4 1/2 inches, this one is not quite there.

I decided to try applique with my next square. I don't like applique, or I don't have the technique and therefore made it more difficult than I thought it would be. Either way, I may end up with only one applique piece in my whole finished quilt.

I gave my box of scraps to my sister-in-law and asked her to pick out scraps for me to use in squares and pin them together. This is what she gave me. The red pieces on the left have started to become a square, she pulled out the reds and I combined them with some scraps of muslin. So far I have been picking out pieces and making a square that works with those pieces, now I need to find a square that will work with what I have bundled. It feels opposite of what I had been doing so it's a little more complicated in my mind.

While we were shopping I had hoped to find the yarn I needed to finish these two Kritters. I ended up looking at a few stores and not finding it before I just ordered the yarn online. That came last week so I hope to finish these guys as soon as I get back into making things. I did finish all the pieces for another Kritter, and I have only to assemble him now.

This week I found myself sculpting in the studio instead of throwing pots on the wheel. I made this bust sculpture seen on my Facebook page, Katlyn Koester Designs, and I started a little dragon sculpture. I like completing slow process pieces, but I get very frustrated while they are in progress and the little dragon is taking some extra thinking to complete.

My handkerchief quilt (seen here) is still without a border. I have the fabric for the borders and squares made for the corners, I just need to get going and assemble the rest of it. I also keep looking at the rest of my fabric stash trying to decide if there is another quick pieced quilt waiting to happen. If I can get some more quilts completed, I'd really like to donate some to a women's shelter or similar organization.

Spring has started to come through, and I hope with the warming weather I get more motivated in the studio. I'll have to with shows starting up in full force for me in a little more than a month. 

I am constantly discovering things about myself. Whether those things are good, bad, dreams, hopes, wishes, or solidifying an image I already had of myself, I hope to learn to use them as motivation in making my life what I hope it to be. My perception of myself changes almost as constantly as the weather changes seasons and the flowers appearing in the still dormant landscape. Maybe I'll have to expand on that thought in a different post. But for now, Hi, sorry I disappeared for a while there, I think I'm back now.

Making Something out of Leftovers

Okay, so when I said a few days ago that I would share the finished handkerchief quilt top with you (here), borders attached, before I left town for a week, I didn't expect to get distracted and find something else to work on. I have the squares made for the corners and the fabrics picked out for the borders and I found something new to try.

My stash of schnibbles.

I started hand sewing/hand piecing 4 1/2 inch blocks from my "schnibbles" stash. "Schnibbles" are those little pieces you cut off from whatever you are working on that are too small to use for a regular sized quilt square, but you're sure are big enough to make into something. I've also seen them called "crumbs," but I really like the word schnibbles. (I discovered even more schnibbles stashed in random places this morning, I knew I had to have more somewhere. Turns out for a while I just threw all the leftovers into whatever container I had been using to organize my current project. So I have more colors to play with now. Yay!)

My first ever hand pieced block.

So I have been wanting to try hand piecing for a while now. One of my many dreams and ideas is to take my fabric stash, or part of it, with me when I go on a year-long tour of the continental 48 states and make quilt squares as I go and since I would be camping, I'd have no where to plug in a sewing machine.

My second block, I got really ambitious after the four patch.

Anyways, I thought I should practice hand piecing in the event that I ever make this epic trip. Also I just like trying new things. So I'm picking pieces out at (not complete) random and making 4 1/2 inch blocks. Completely by hand. I haven't even pulled out my iron to press anything as you can probably tell by the creases in some of my fabric.

Abstract, yet simple third block.

I started with the four patch block because it required 3 seams and all right angles. Easy peasy. Except then I felt the need to challenge myself and I did the blue crazy square with a streak of green where only two seams out of many joined at right angles. I had to then scale back and do another square with only three seams.

Took a while to find long enough strips in the colors I was using without going into my regular stash.

I wanted to then try something a little more traditional. So I tried a log cabin variation, which I am quite pleased with. At least I think it would be considered a variation since I used different widths of strips for the concentric squares and a larger center square. And I've just finished my fifth block. Sort of reminiscent of the stained glass blocks that I really love with the solid black surrounding all the jewel toned fabrics.

My fifth block, starting to see maybe planning specific blocks is going to be tough.

So now that I've tried several variations, I want to try grabbing fabric at random and seeing if I can be spontaneous. Something I'm not very good at. I always need a plan and to know where I am going next. Maybe I should have someone else pick out the fabric schnibbles and I have to make something from their choices. 

I feel I always need to be trying something new, learning a new technique or craft (like my broom making experience) and if I'm not, then I seem more anxious. I don't know if anyone else notices my anxiety when my learning has been stagnant for a while, but I feel it. That is usually when I jump head first into a new project without any regard as to how I could make it work business-wise. I just need something different, something to play with, and that's okay!

Where do I go?

If any of you wonder where I go between posts, here it is.

My display of maple syrup pitchers from my first show this year.

I work part time at the paint department in the local hardware store. Really part time. I've been at this same store but different positions for 14 years this summer. During my time there I have worked freight days stocking shelves, I've been in the greenhouse, I've been a carry-out boy, I've worked on the floor, and most recently for the last several years I have been in the paint department. Mostly I am working at this job to pay my bills, day-to-day expenses, and to have a little extra to squirrel away if I'm lucky. My boss is really awesome and allows me an extremely flexible schedule so I can prepare for and go to art shows for my pottery.

A plate I finished in a firing before my first show this year.

That's another place I disappear to in between posts. When I'm preparing for a show that is happening that week, my creative time tends to get all compressed and I force extra firings in to have new work ready for the show. Not really allowing for much time for writing or for what I would consider interesting topics to write about. I'm guessing no one really wants to hear about me restocking my bubble wrap and gift bags, right?

More of a booth shot from last weekend.

I might also be out of town. Like next week. If you don't hear from me next week, it means I'm out of town. Which I will be. Going out of town isn't too common of an occurrence for me, but when I do go somewhere it is usually to spend some time with my brother and sister-in-law. I get to have some much needed girl time with my sister-in-law and play time with my nephew.

Preparing to make borders for the handkerchief quilt.

If I manage to finish it I'll share with you my handkerchief quilt top (From my last post, Find it here!) with borders before the weekend. I'm hoping I'll find some backing fabric for it when I go to visit my sister-in-law.

"Baby Bowls," small bowls I add recycled glass to.

Something I've found about working randomly at the paint department or when I'm planning on going out of town is that it is really hard for me to do any pottery. Technically I have the time to finish things on my days off, but the thought is there in the back of my mind, "What if I don't have enough time to finish and it dries out before I can get back to it?" This always stalls me when I want to be doing pottery or clay things. It's all too easy for me to procrastinate and so I end up not doing the work and instead I work on things easily set aside like quilting and crochet. That's also why I end up pushing myself the weeks I have shows, I know I have time those weeks, because I specifically asked for the time.

A bowl from the firing before my first show.

I try to do as much as I can creatively every day. Some days that's harder than others and a lot of the time I don't feel there is any motivation for me to work. My internal motivation is externally driven. If I work at my part time job, I don't feel like doing creative work. If I don't have a show to get ready for or a specific deadline I have to have something ready for, I don't always feel like being productive. I always have ideas and goals running through my head, but I've got to figure out something really compelling to get myself out to the studio.

Quick Snowy Day Handkerchief Quilt

Ok. I admit I've not really been into pottery or crochet for a while. I've just been going through the motions for the last week or so because I know I have a show, my first show of the season, on Saturday. I know I needed to be ready for it, but all I've been able to accomplish is the bare minimum to be ready. I priced work, got one last kiln fired, packed up my boxes, and I have everything stacked, ready to go and with my remaining time I've been trying to make a few crocheted animals to take up to Artistree Gallery. 

I just don't feel like being a potter. So today I wasn't. Today I was a quilter. And I had a blast. I really did. I got almost an entire quilt top put together in about 5 hours. Plus with the snow coming down outside again, it was nice to be playing with fabric!

The handkerchiefs my mom found.

I've seen a couple examples of quick quilts made of handkerchiefs on Pinterest. You can find anything on Pinterest. And it just so happened that my mom found a bag of hankies left over from something my brother did in high school and she asked me if I could do anything with them. Well Yeah! I had actually just seen the examples on Pinterest when she asked me this and I decided today I was going to be a quilter.

I used a white board to work out what I was going to do. I had 6 blue hankies, 4 navy blue, and 5 five red. I was going to cut each one into 4 triangles to make half square triangles. And with my first layout design I needed 17 blue triangles, 16 navy, and 17 red. That would leave me with one whole blue hankie and a partial as well as a partial red hankie. I was hoping I could do a border with what I had left.

My second layout was rectangular and only needed 16 triangles of each color. And I figured that would be 8 half square triangles (HST) of each color combination. This is the layout I planned on using.

I don't like sewing triangles together so I use some shortcuts when I'm making multiples of triangle pieced squares.

And I'll admit right away, I messed up when I started sewing. You see normally when I'm making HST they are small and I make two from each square. You sew diagonally across the square on either side of a draw line and then cut on the line. This time though I needed 4 HST out of each square or hankie. I sewed through the middle of my hankies when I should have sewn around the outside edge and cut on the diagonals to get 4 HST using 1/4 of each hankie. So I'm going to describe what I did instead.

With hankies "right side" "wrong side" doesn't really matter. Both sides are the same color. The only ways to know if you have the right side or not is to check the printed words, if they are backwards you are looking at the wrong side and the hem around the edge shows a bump on the wrong side.

Pair up the hankies based on what color combinations you need in the design. Draw lines diagonally corner to corner both ways.

I sew a presser foot width on either side of the drawn lines. Line up the edge of the presser foot with the drawn line and sew down one side then turn it around and sew down the other side.

Do this on both lines to make a cross of stitches. I chain sewed my hankies, lining up the next seam when I came to the end of the last. You'll waste less thread this way.

This is where I realized I had done something wrong to make it to my original design.

Next cut on the drawn lines both directions to make 4 triangles. At this point they are not good for much except maybe a hat or an impromptu bag for berry picking.

I just made them into smaller HST.

Then cut vertically from the point to halfway across the bottom.

Do this to all the paired hankies.

Next press all the seams to the dark sides.

I don't know if I've mentioned in other posts that I am a lazy quilter. Unless a square is totally and completely the wrong size, I don't "square up" my squares. I just go with it. I did cut off the little corner bits that stuck out though. This gets rid of some of the extra bulk that occurs anywhere multiple seams meet.

I laid out all the pieces to make sure I liked the way it looked. They could have been rearranged to make diamonds or zigzags, but I like this look, and it didn't require much thinking.

Next sew the individual squares into rows.

And sew the rows into a single top. I still have 2 full blue hankies and a full red one, I'm thinking I may put a border on it yet, but to get to this point only took me about 5 hours. Would have been less if I had realized where I went wrong before I had sewed all the hankies together. I wasn't about to pull out all those stitches, but I improvised a little and ended up with a fun, bright quilt top. Now I just need to put on a border and get batting and a backing fabric. I may have something I can use in my stash right now.

I used the hankies I had on hand, but there are handkerchiefs available in craft stores that are every color of the rainbow and those would make some really fun, bright quilts! And super quick to put together!

The Nightmare of Pricing

As an artist I am forced time and time again to determine the "value" of my work. Any artist if they plan on selling work must place "value" on their work. How can I decide how much my time is worth? Figuring the cost of materials is no problem. I just have to estimate how much material I used and then divide that amount from the whole price of what I bought the assorted materials for.

No big deal.

Baby bowls with recycled wine bottles melted into the bottoms.

But to decide that my time is worth X amount, and then figure the specific amount of time I spent on that one item, when I don't make one piece at a time, and multiply X by time and add in materials cost... I'm still not sure that really covers the "value" of any piece of my work.

One of my crocheted pigs.

At art fairs I get asked how long I've been doing pottery and often I get asked how long it took me to make a mug for example. Well, I've been making pottery for sixteen years and while it may have only taken me five minutes to actually throw that mug, I haven't only spent five minutes making that mug. I've spent sixteen years and five minutes. Sixteen years of practice and scrapping work and starting over is really very hard to place an accurate "value" on.

Mugs, the one item every potter gets asked for.

I also have to add in drying time, adding a handle, firing, glazing, and firing again. But like I said before, I don't make just one mug at a time. I will wedge up about 20 one pound balls of clay, throw 20 mugs, wait for them to dry, trim and attach handles to 20 mugs, wait for them to dry completely checking often to make sure the handles are staying attached, fire those 20 along with other pieces in a kiln for 8-10 hours, glaze all those pieces, fire them again for 8-10 hours and then I have to determine "value" for just that one mug and all the other individual pieces.

A serving bowl or large salad bowl.

And that's just for my pottery. How do I figure the same "value" of my other things I make? My quilts and crocheted items require different amounts of time and attention than my pottery does, but I still have to figure out a price.

A baby quilt or lap quilt I made from an assortment of fat quarters.

I seem to undervalue my work. While I have no problem spending $30-40 on another potter's mugs, I'm still afraid to ask for that much on one of my mugs. I think they are worth more than what I ask for them, but I'm afraid other people won't see that much "value" in my work. Which is why it has taken me six years to finally price my work closer to what I think it is really worth. I'm still not sure if I will have given my work enough "value" even after I reprice everything, but hopefully I'm getting closer and hopefully others will see the true value of my work and not just a price sticker.